Autism Conference at Graceview Baptist Church

Wow. Today was a spin-back to almost two decades ago... an autism conference in Austin...Well. Time flies. Caleb turned 23 in August. I feel I have lived three or four lifetimes in his lifetime. We tried so many things back then, many of which had booths in the resource hall today - Auditory Integrative Therapy and S.I.R.E. (therapeutic horseback riding), among others. I never feel I'm doing enough and most of the other parents scurrying around the hall, bagging pamphlets and pens, receiving free advice, don't either. An outsider could see it on our faces: looks like sorrow covered up in smiles. Looks like tension relieved for a little while, but not, because we are focused on the very things we cannot seem to fix in our autistic children. Like stemming and other bizarrities; obsessive or aggressive behaviors; brain allergies; seizures; lack of, poor, or inappropriate communication; no friends (for the adult especially); siblings hurt or plain left out. Heavy subjects. How about marriages dissolved? That too. Water under the bridge. All sorts of failures one must leave behind in order to move forward into some sort of productivity and usefulness.

Do you know what I mean? We all have situations in our lives that we cannot, no matter how hard we try, fix. At the moment I am overwhelmed with information from this conference. I want to undo all of my son's medications, get the toxins out of his body, and start over. This is pretty much what both of the workshops I attended said to do. But they also said not to try all this detoxing stuff at once, but come to them (naturopathics mainly) for help, and take caution. Pay thousands for the hyperbaric chamber treatments if you can afford it, since insurance doesn't cover. Buy the expensive electromagnetic blanket and hook it up three times a day. Never give milk or gluten. Keep away from 10,000 chemicals in our environment. Your child is toxic... my brain spins and feels like an explosion of pain. My mother has cancer. My husband lost his father. My grandmother needs rides to the doctor and attention. My daughter got a divorce and has three little children. Puzzled? Look at my bio. Did I say I was not a perfect person with a perfect life? Now, believe it. My life is tough. So is yours I bet.

Okay. So here's the good part of all this: God's unfailing love surrounds those who trust in Him (read Ps. 32, 33) deliverance is from Him (Ps.3:8) and He will hear our cries and deliver us from all of our troubles (Ps.34:17). He is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit. (Ps.34:18) This is me right now. Have you ever been where I am right now? God is our help and our strong deliverer--"The salvation of the righteous comes from the Lord; he is their stronghold in time of trouble. The Lord helps them and delivers them; he delivers them from the wicked and saves them, because they take refuge in him." Ps. 37:39,40 Take courage,friend, along with me. God is good and forever will be.